Monday, December 23, 2019

Sermon from Grace and St Stephen’s 12/22/19 Matthew 1:18-25



     “The most joyful event of the season!”  That’s what the glittery gold words on my screen read.  “The most joyful event of the season.”  By season they mean Christmas season so maybe the most joyful event of the Christmas season might be the mass or worship service celebrating the birth of Christ.  Or maybe it is referring to the actual birth of Christ- the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, the taking on of flesh by God the creator of the universe, the proclamation of Emmanuel, the coming of the Prince of Peace, salvation for us all, peace for the world and hope for ages to come … But actually, the glittery gold words weren’t referring to any of those things.  Turns out, “the most joyful event of the season” involves Taylor Swift, James Corden and Jennifer Hudson dressed as cats in the movie based on the famous Broadway musical.  “The most joyful event of the season” is apparently sitting in a theater for two hours watching people dressed as cats dance and sing.  And maybe it is a good movie, but I feel like we can do better as far as joy goes …
          My skepticism continued as I sat in a crowded gymnasium and watched first graders dressed as Christmas trees sing and dance.  It was a lovely little play showcasing the talents and joy of the children.  At the end all the little Christmas trees learn from Santa Claus what Christmas is really about.  Turns out it’s friendship and kindness.  I clapped and smiled along with the rest of the audience but inside my head I was saying “really?  Is it?” 
          As far as pop culture holiday lessons go, few hit the nail on the head as well as the classic Charlie Brown Christmas because it’s difficult to truly capture the joy of Christmas without mention of Jesus.  I get the importance of being sensitive to all backgrounds and beliefs, but I think the secular messages of “what Christmas is all about” or “the most joyful event of the season” are really kind of sad and depressing, even though they may cause a passing nostalgic smile.  If all of the songs, decorations, anticipation, hopes, desperate cries and preparations are really just for a moment of feeling good- we walk away with our hearts longing for more.  Longing for something that cuts through the surface, digs deep within us and speaks to our souls. 
          Isaiah and Matthew have a different idea of “the most joyful event of the season” … or even “the most joyful event of human existence.”  Isaiah describes the sign God will send to “weary mortals” and the words echo across the pages of our Bible and over hundreds of years and then catch the ear of a troubled and confused man in a dream.  “Emmanuel”  “God with us” - convinces Joseph to take a chance on faith.  Hundreds of years later it echoes here in this space.  The hope of all creation, salvation for all of us, an answer to our longing - “Emmanuel … God with us.” 
          Theologian Elizabeth Johnson writes, “Christian faith is grounded on the experience that God who is Spirit, at work in the tragic and beautiful world to vivify and renew all creatures through the gracious power of her indwelling, liberating love, is present yet again through the very particular history of one human being, Jesus of Nazareth.  The one who is divine love, gift, and friend becomes manifest in time a concrete gestalt … According to the witness of Scripture, Jesus is a genuine Spirit-phenomenon, conceived, inspired, sent, hovered over, guided and risen from the dead … Through his human history the Spirit who pervades the universe becomes concretely present in a small bit of it … In a word, Jesus is Emmanuel, God with us … In the circle of life where Christ’s way is followed, a new possibility of shalom, of redemptive wholeness, is made experientially available and can be tasted in anticipation, even now, as the struggle of history goes on.” [1]
          Sounds pretty great … I  mean it’s no dancing cats, but … Salvation, joy, peace, redemption, Holy Spirit dwelling on earth, God in flesh, Emmanuel  … that’s where I am placing my hope. 
          I wonder what all of this meant to Joseph.  He had a very important decision to make.  The woman he was engaged to was pregnant and not by him.  That in itself is cause for heart break, loss of trust and anger, but at the time it also could mean severe punishment for this young woman he hoped to wed.   Shame, disgrace, even punishment by death were possibilities.  It sounds as though he weighed heavily his options and looked for what he deemed to be the most reasonable and compassionate option … until an angel showed up in a dream and reason went out the window.  Confusion, indecision, perhaps agony and grief gave way to faith and enlightenment.  That’s not always an easy step to make.
          As we have been studying the book of Job in Wednesday night Bible Study and reflecting on faith in difficult times I have been thinking about difficult times in my life.  There have been times when confusion, doubts, fear and anxiety filled my mind and my soul.  Times when I have sat with the door closed and wondered who I am, who God is, how do we cope with the pain of the world, how do we find assurance when doubt is so strong?  I have to say that in those moments of darkness, wrestling, grief and turmoil I have always known God is near … even when I don’t know what that means.  I don’t think it’s because I have some super faith or extra wisdom.  I just think it’s just practice.
          I have been praying over and over again on Sunday mornings, at bedtime, on walks and everywhere else throughout my life.  I have been listening to scriptures read, sermons preached and the faith stories of others.  I have been singing the words of hymns I don’t always comprehend in the moment.  I have looked at art dedicated to God, stared at scenes depicted in stained glass, lit candles, hung Christmas lights, witnessed incredible acts of love and read theology books.  Somehow, in all of that, something got inside.  In all of that practicing, a belief crept deep into my soul and set up camp.  And when all seems lost and my stomach churns and my soul seems unsteady I see the lantern lit and I somehow know “Emmanuel” God with us, even though I can’t explain it. 
            I remember a conversation some years ago with a church member trying to persuade me to put Christmas carols in the Advent bulletins.  She said “we all know what happens anyway, why wait.”  It’s true.  We know the songs we will sing on Tuesday night, the baby that will be placed in the manger, the familiar scripture that will be read and the order the candles will be lit.  But we keep telling the story anyway … over and over again.  We wait, we anticipate, we prepare and we hope.  And somewhere in that process our hearts are cracked open to the good news of Emmanuel, God with us.  As convincing now as it was when Isaiah said it and Joseph dreamed it. 
          Julian of Norwich writes, “For it is God’s will that we have true delight with him in our salvation, and in it God wants us to be greatly comforted and strengthened, and so joyfully God wishes our souls to be occupied with God’s grace.  For we are God’s bliss, because God endlessly delights in us; and so with God’s grace shall we delight in God.  All that God does for us and has done and will do was never expense or labour to God … beginning at the sweet Incarnation and lasting until his blessed Resurrection on Easter morning.  So long did the labour and expense of our redemption last, in which deed God always and endlessly rejoices.”[2] 
          I love that image of God sharing in our true delight, “joyfully occupying our souls.”  The most joyful event of the season, not just for us but for our God longing to be with us.  God with us, joyfully redeeming us, dwelling in time, setting up camp in our hearts. It’s coming.  So let’s practice, let’s prepare, let’s sing our Advent hymns and flood our hearts with anticipation.  Let us raise our hands in hope because Jesus is coming … and that is a joy that will last longer than a nostalgic memory, longer than a movie, longer than a twinkling light, it is an eternal joy-   Emmanuel- God with us.  Amen.



[1] Johnson, Elizabeth.  She Who Is: The Mystery of God in Feminist Theological Discourse. The Crossroad Publishing Company, 2002.  Pp. 150-151.
[2] Colledge, Edmund and Walsh, James, eds.  Julian of Norwich: Showings. Paulist Pres, 1978.  Pp 219.  (edited pronouns)

Wednesday, December 4, 2019

I don't hate being a youth pastor


     It's true. I don't hate being the youth pastor. Perhaps I should explain. I got my first job as a youth director at a United Methodist Church when I had just turned 20 years old. I was working three jobs, paying rent and going to college full time. I was so excited to cut back to only two jobs because I was getting a salary. I would be paid $10,000 a year for 20 hours per week and to celebrate I went to the mall and bought myself two new outfits. I learned a lot at that job and had a lot of fun. I cringe now at some of the mistakes I made never due to bad intentions but rather lack of experience and education. Wonderful parents, staff and pastors guided me along and we had a good time.
     My second year of seminary I anxiously awaited my field education placement. This was my chance to test my skills as a pastor and learn about leading a congregation. When I got the call telling me I would be a youth leader I was a little disappointed. I wanted to be seen as more than a young adult assumed to have lots of energy and relatability, I wanted to be seen as a pastor. I remember talking about this with fellow seminarians who were feeling the same frustration. We felt like we were a cheap option for churches that needed youth ministers. I ended up having a lot of relevant experience in that position and getting to know some wonderful young people.
     I would find myself in youth ministry again when I served as an associate pastor before I got appointed as the sole pastor of a mid- sized congregation. I learned a lot from my youth leader experiences and got to work with some amazing teens and parents. I cried at baccalaureate services and laughed until I cried at silly lock-in games. Even when I was the only pastor of a church I still found myself taking teens on a week long mission trip, meeting them for coffee after school and going to high school sporting events to cheer them on.
     I will say though that when I left my associate pastor position where I was responsible for the youth program I was relieved to be done with some things. I was sad to say goodbye to the wonderful congregation, but I was happy to say goodbye to scrambling for chaperones and drivers, tracking down permission slips, having teens flake on scheduled meetings and events, trying to order the right amount of pizza and sleeping on gym floors.
     Now that I am back in youth ministry I find myself doing some of those things again (we had two leftover pizzas at the last event so I'm still working on that). But I also know myself much better now. I am not the hyper youth pastor chasing kids with a nerf gun and high fiving my way down the halls. That is so not me. I am however the person to go to with theological questions, emotions and doubts. And they have them. I am the person who geuinely wants to know what their lives are like and how they experience the world. I am the person who cares about them very much and believes their faith development and connection to their faith community is one of the most important things for their life journey.
     So, I am not afraid to hang back when they all run around to play some high energy game and have a deep discussion with the ones not participating. I don't need to pretend to be cool or hyper or into Youtube. They want someone to listen, they want to ask the big questions, they want to feel connected to each other and God. I get that.
     It is weird being introduced as a “youth pastor” since it feels a little like I haven't moved on since that first job 18 years ago. I love preaching, providing pastoral care to all ages, leading services and leading adult small groups and I also get to do all of those things. I also love working with the teens. Sure, part of that is because in every church I have worked in it just so happens the teens have been particularly insightful, open and awesome. But also I think it's just like with all ministry, it's ok to play to our strengths, be who we genuinely are and admit when we are sick of sleeping on gym floors.
     So, seminarians take heart when you get your field ed placement and find that a church sees you as a cheap way to get a youth pastor. It may feel like you aren't being taken seriously as a pastor and only your young age is being considered, but it is an opportunity to do important, influential and fulfilling work for the Kingdom of God … plus there's pizza.