Tuesday, February 25, 2020

A Devotional Guide for Lent for Teens and their Families



This guide is for daily devotions and can be used by anyone but is geared toward teens.  These can be used individually or as a family.  Ash Wednesday and Sundays are omitted as those are days of communal worship.  Information for feast days comes from Lesser Feasts and Fasts 2018.  The scripture readings and collects can be found at lectionarypage.net

Thursday, February 27
Scripture: Luke 9:18–25
Once when Jesus was praying alone, with only the disciples near him, he asked them, “Who do the crowds say that I am?” They answered, “John the Baptist; but others, Elijah; and still others, that one of the ancient prophets has arisen.” He said to them, “But who do you say that I am?” Peter answered, “The Messiah of God.”
He sternly ordered and commanded them not to tell anyone, saying, “The Son of Man must undergo great suffering, and be rejected by the elders, chief priests, and scribes, and be killed, and on the third day be raised.”
Then he said to them all, “If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me. For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will save it. What does it profit them if they gain the whole world, but lose or forfeit themselves?”
Reflection: Who is Jesus to you?  Be honest.  Ask your family members who Jesus is to them.  One of the themes of the Gospels is that the people who are supposed to understand (religious scholars, disciples, etc.) who Jesus is don’t get it and the people on the outside who aren’t supposed to understand (the sick, women, Roman soldiers, children, etc.) get it.  Why do you think the people without power and the people no one else liked seemed to understand Jesus so well? 
On this day the Episcopal Church remembers the poet George Herbert.  This is a poem he wrote called Prayer. Perhaps there is a word or idea in this poem that might inspire your prayer today:
Prayer the church's banquet, angel's age,
God's breathe in man returning to his birth,
The soul in paraphrase, heart in pilgrimage,
The Christian plummet sounding heav'n and earth
Engine against th' Almighty, sinner's tow'r,
Reversed thunder, Christ-side-piercing spear,
The six-days world transposing in an hour,
A kind of tune, which all things hear and fear;
Softness, and peace, and joy, and love, and bliss,
Exalted manna, gladness of the best,
Heaven in ordinary, man well drest,
The milky way, the bird of Paradise,
Church-bells beyond the stars heard, the soul's blood,
The land of spices; something understood.

Friday, February 28

Scripture: Psalm 51:1–10
1 Have mercy on me, O God, according to your loving-kindness; *
in your great compassion blot out my offenses.

2 Wash me through and through from my wickedness *
and cleanse me from my sin.

3 For I know my transgressions, *
and my sin is ever before me.

4 Against you only have I sinned *
and done what is evil in your sight.

5 And so you are justified when you speak *
and upright in your judgment.

6 Indeed, I have been wicked from my birth, *
a sinner from my mother's womb.

7 For behold, you look for truth deep within me, *
and will make me understand wisdom secretly.

8 Purge me from my sin, and I shall be pure; *
wash me, and I shall be clean indeed.

9 Make me hear of joy and gladness, *
that the body you have broken may rejoice.

10 Hide your face from my sins *
and blot out all my iniquities.

Reflection: I love this Psalm.  Sometimes guilt or shame or regret hits me hard and this Psalm feels like it hears what is in my soul.  Sure, it’s a little dramatic, I mean “wicked from my birth” … but sometimes the Psalms can place words on the dramatic feelings we have.  How do you feel right now?  What does it mean to say “that the body you have broken may rejoice?” Try to voice your brokenness to God and know that you are cleansed. 

Saturday, February 29

Scripture: Luke 5:27–32
After healing the paralyzed man, Jesus went out and saw a tax collector named Levi, sitting at the tax booth; and he said to him, “Follow me.” And he got up, left everything, and followed him.
Then Levi gave a great banquet for him in his house; and there was a large crowd of tax collectors and others sitting at the table with them. The Pharisees and their scribes were complaining to his disciples, saying, “Why do you eat and drink with tax collectors and sinners?” Jesus answered, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick; I have come to call not the righteous but sinners to repentance.”
Reflection: Nobody liked the tax collectors.  Not only did they take your money, but they gave it to the Roman Empire that oppressed the people.  Why would Jesus pick the person nobody liked?  When have you felt like nobody liked you? How would Jesus have treated you during those times?
Collect (Prayer): Almighty and everlasting God, mercifully look upon our infirmities, and in all our dangers and necessities stretch forth your right hand to help and defend us; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Monday, March 2
Scripture: Leviticus 19:1–2,11–18
The Lord spoke to Moses, saying:
Speak to all the congregation of the people of Israel and say to them: You shall be holy, for I the Lord your God am holy.
You shall not steal; you shall not deal falsely; and you shall not lie to one another. And you shall not swear falsely by my name, profaning the name of your God: I am the Lord.
You shall not defraud your neighbor; you shall not steal; and you shall not keep for yourself the wages of a laborer until morning. You shall not revile the deaf or put a stumbling block before the blind; you shall fear your God: I am the Lord.
You shall not render an unjust judgment; you shall not be partial to the poor or defer to the great: with justice you shall judge your neighbor. You shall not go around as a slanderer among your people, and you shall not profit by the blood of your neighbor: I am the Lord.
You shall not hate in your heart anyone of your kin; you shall reprove your neighbor, or you will incur guilt yourself. You shall not take vengeance or bear a grudge against any of your people, but you shall love your neighbor as yourself: I am the Lord.
Reflection: “You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”  This is a HUGE deal in Christianity (and Judaism).  It is good to ask “who is my neighbor and how can I love them?” But first don’t forget that this commands us to love ourselves.  Can you say out loud “I love myself?”  What does that feel like?  Why do you think it feels that way?  Perhaps a spiritual practice for Lent might be simply saying “I love myself” out loud once every day. 
Prayer: Dear God, thank you for me. Amen.

Tuesday, March 3
Scripture: Matthew 6:7–15
Jesus said, “When you are praying, do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do; for they think that they will be heard because of their many words. Do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.
“Pray then in this way: Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come. Your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors. And do not bring us to the time of trial, but rescue us from the evil one. For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you; but if you do not forgive others, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.”
Reflection: Who have you trespassed against today (or who might you have hurt by words, actions or silence)?  Who are you upset with that you need to forgive?
Today is the feast day of John and Charles Wesley.  These are the words to a hymn written by Charles Wesley called “Love Divine, All Loves Excelling” (number 657 in our Hymnal)
Love divine, all loves excelling,
Joy of heav'n to earth come down:
fix in us thy humble dwelling,
all thy faithful mercies crown:
Jesus, thou art all compassion,
pure, unbounded love thou art;
visit us with thy salvation,
enter ev'ry trembling heart.

Come, Almighty to deliver,
let us all thy life receive;
suddenly return, and never,
nevermore thy temples leave.
Thee we would be always blessing,
serve thee as thy hosts above,
pray and praise thee without ceasing,
glory in thy perfect love.

Finish, then, thy new creation;
pure and spotless let us be:
let us see thy great salvation
perfectly restored in thee;
changed from glory into glory,
'til in heav'n we take our place,
'til we cast our crowns before thee,
lost in wonder, love, and praise.

Wednesday, March 4  

Scripture: Psalm 51:11–18

11 Create in me a clean heart, O God, *
and renew a right spirit within me.

12 Cast me not away from your presence *
and take not your holy Spirit from me.

13 Give me the joy of your saving help again *
and sustain me with your bountiful Spirit.

14 I shall teach your ways to the wicked, *
and sinners shall return to you.

15 Deliver me from death, O God, *
and my tongue shall sing of your righteousness,
O God of my salvation.

16 Open my lips, O Lord, *
and my mouth shall proclaim your praise.

17 Had you desired it, I would have offered sacrifice, *
but you take no delight in burnt-offerings.

18 The sacrifice of God is a troubled spirit; *
a broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise.

Reflection: Do any parts of this Psalm sound familiar?  The Psalms are a big part of the Book of Common Prayer which we use for worship.  How do we offer God a broken heart?  Why would God want that as our sacrifice?
Collect (Prayer): Bless us, O God, in this holy season, in which our hearts seek your help and healing; and so purify us by your discipline that we may grow in grace and in the knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ; who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Thursday, March 5
In the Book My Faith, My Life, Jenifer Gamber writes:
When I was a young child, my father would tell me to take some time every day to be by myself.  I really didn’t know what I was supposed to do.  I thought I was with myself all the time!  In fact, so much so that sometimes I wanted to crawl out of my skin.  Daytime was my time to be busy, spending time with my friends and being involved in lots of activities.  But I usually gave in to my dad’s strange suggestion and dragged my feet to the hammock in our backyard.  As I lay in the gentle rocking of the hammock and stared up into the canopy of leaves above, I soon forgot that I was mad at my father for making me be alone.  The voice of anger quieted and I’d begin to notice the quietness of the day and the warm rays of sun making their ways through the leaves.  Soon, I noticed a voice inside of me and I listened.  I listened to its goodness and love.  I didn’t recognize it at the time, but these were times of prayer, times when I was filled with God’s love and presence.
For your prayer today, simply say “Dear God” and offer silence for as long as you can.  Maybe you can only do a couple of minutes today, but try again and each time try to go a little longer.  I wonder what that voice inside you wants to tell you …

Friday, March 6
Scripture Psalm 130
1 Out of the depths have I called to you, O Lord;
Lord, hear my voice; *
let your ears consider well the voice of my supplication.

2 If you, Lord, were to note what is done amiss, *
O Lord, who could stand?

3 For there is forgiveness with you; *
therefore you shall be feared.

4 I wait for the Lord; my soul waits for him; *
in his word is my hope.

5 My soul waits for the Lord,
more than watchmen for the morning, *
more than watchmen for the morning.

6 O Israel, wait for the Lord, *
for with the Lord there is mercy;

7 With him there is plenteous redemption, *
and he shall redeem Israel from all their sins.

Reflection: Some people say that young people today don’t know how to wait for things because technology makes everything faster.  How do you feel about that? What do you wait for?  What does it mean for your soul to wait for the Lord?
Arcade Fire “We Used to Wait”
I used to write
I used to write letters
I used to sign my name
I used to sleep at night
Before the flashing lights settled deep in my brain
But by the time we met
By the time we met
The times had already changed
So I never wrote a letter
I never took my true heart
I never wrote it down
So when the lights cut out
I was lost standing in the wilderness downtown
Now our lives are changing fast
Now our lives are changing fast
Hope that something pure can last
Hope that something pure can last
It seems strange
How we used to wait for letters to arrive
But what's stranger still
Is how something so small can keep you alive
We used to wait
We used to waste hours just walkin' around
We used to wait
All those wasted lives in the wilderness downtown
Oh, we used to wait
Sometimes it never came (we used to wait)
Sometimes it never came (we used to wait)
Still moving through the pain
I'm gonna write a letter to my true love
I'm gonna sign my name
Like a patient on a table
I wanna walk again
Gonna move through the pain
Now our lives are changing fast
Now our lives are changing fast
Hope that something pure can last
Hope that something pure can last
Oh, we used to wait
Sometimes it never came (we used to wait)
Sometimes it never came (we used to wait)
Still moving through the pain
We used to wait for it
We used to wait for it
Now we're screaming
Sing the chorus again
I used to wait for it
I used to wait for it
Hear my voice screaming
Sing the chorus again
Wait for it
Wait for it
Wait for it

Saturday, March 7
Scripture: Matthew 5:43–48
Jesus said, “You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be children of your Father in heaven; for he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the righteous and on the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers and sisters, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the same? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.”
Reflection: Loving your enemies is hard.  Being perfect is hard.  I am one of those people who thinks I should be perfect and beats myself up when I am not.  Do you do that?  What do you wish you did perfectly?  This passage says be perfect like God is perfect, what if it’s about being perfect simply by loving?  How might we do this?

Monday, March 9
Today is the feast day of Gregory of Nyssa.  He was born in the year 335.  This is a quote from him:  “Concepts create idols; only wonder comprehends anything. People kill one another over idols. Wonder makes us fall to our knees.”
Reflection: A concept might be “God is almighty” while wondering might say “God’s love is beyond what I can explain” or perhaps “I wonder where God is at work in my life?” What do you wonder? 
Collect: Let your Spirit, O Lord, come into the midst of us to wash us with the pure water of repentance, and prepare us to be always a living sacrifice to you; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Tuesday, March 10
Today is the feast day of Harriet Tubman.  When Harriet was 24 years old she escaped from slavery and fled to Canada but “could not forget her parents and other slaves she left behind.” She led over 300 people to freedom through the underground railroad and was referred to as Moses because like Moses she led her people to freedom. 
Reflection: What does it mean to work for justice? Do you believe as Christians we have a special responsibility to working for justice?  How can you work for justice in your life? How do we remember those who are not free and need our help?
Collect: O God, whose Spirit guides us into all truth and makes us free: Strengthen and sustain us as you did your servant Harriet.  Give us vision and courage to stand against oppression and injustice and all that works against the glorious liberty to which you call all your children; through Jesus Christ our Savior, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever.  Amen.

Wednesday, March 11
Scripture: Matthew 20:17–28
While Jesus was going up to Jerusalem, he took the twelve disciples aside by themselves, and said to them on the way, “See, we are going up to Jerusalem, and the Son of Man will be handed over to the chief priests and scribes, and they will condemn him to death; then they will hand him over to the Gentiles to be mocked and flogged and crucified; and on the third day he will be raised.”
Then the mother of the sons of Zebedee came to him with her sons, and kneeling before him, she asked a favor of him. And he said to her, “What do you want?” She said to him, “Declare that these two sons of mine will sit, one at your right hand and one at your left, in your kingdom.” But Jesus answered, “You do not know what you are asking. Are you able to drink the cup that I am about to drink?” They said to him, “We are able.” He said to them, “You will indeed drink my cup, but to sit at my right hand and at my left, this is not mine to grant, but it is for those for whom it has been prepared by my Father.”
When the ten heard it, they were angry with the two brothers. But Jesus called them to him and said, “You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones are tyrants over them. It will not be so among you; but whoever wishes to be great among you must be your servant, and whoever wishes to be first among you must be your slave; just as the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life a ransom for many.”
Reflection: What in your life feels competitive? Do you hear people trying to be the favorite or bragging about being the best? Jesus says that those who wish to be first must not be served but rather serve, do you see any examples of people who earn respect by serving or helping others?
Collect: O God, you so loved the world that you gave your only- begotten Son to reconcile earth with heaven: Grant that we, loving you above all things, may love our friends in you, and our enemies for your sake; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Thursday, March 12
Scripture: Jeremiah 17:5–10
Thus says the Lord: Cursed are those who trust in mere mortals
and make mere flesh their strength,
whose hearts turn away from the Lord.
They shall be like a shrub in the desert,
and shall not see when relief comes.
They shall live in the parched places of the wilderness,
in an uninhabited salt land.
Blessed are those who trust in the Lord,
whose trust is the Lord.
They shall be like a tree planted by water,
sending out its roots by the stream.
It shall not fear when heat comes,
and its leaves shall stay green;
in the year of drought it is not anxious,
and it does not cease to bear fruit.
The heart is devious above all else;
it is perverse--
who can understand it?
I the Lord test the mind
and search the heart,
to give to all according to their ways,
according to the fruit of their doings.
Reflection: This is hymn number 686 “Come Thou Fount of Every Blessing.”  Sufjan Stevens has a beautiful version of it, listen to it on your streaming service.  What stands out for you?
Come, Thou Fount of every blessing,
tune my heart to sing Thy grace;
streams of mercy, never ceasing,
call for songs of loudest praise.

Teach me some melodious sonnet,
sung by flaming tongues above.
Praise the mount, I’m fixed upon it,
Mount of Thy redeeming love.

Here I find my greatest treasure;
hither by thy help I’ve come;
and I hope by thy good pleasure,
safely to arrive at home.

Jesus sought me when a stranger
wandering from the fold of God;
he, to rescue me from danger,
interposed his precious blood.

O to grace how great a debtor
daily I’m constrained to be!
Let Thy goodness, like a fetter,
bind my wandering heart to Thee.
 Prone to wander, Lord, I feel it,
prone to leave the God I love;
here’s my heart, O take and seal it,
seal it for Thy courts above.

Friday, March 13
Scripture: Genesis 37:3–4,12–28
Israel loved Joseph more than any other of his children, because he was the son of his old age; and he had made him a long robe with sleeves. But when his brothers saw that their father loved him more than all his brothers, they hated him, and could not speak peaceably to him.
Now his brothers went to pasture their father's flock near Shechem. And Israel said to Joseph, "Are not your brothers pasturing the flock at Shechem? Come, I will send you to them." He answered, "Here I am." So he said to him, "Go now, see if it is well with your brothers and with the flock; and bring word back to me." So he sent him from the valley of Hebron.
He came to Shechem, and a man found him wandering in the fields; the man asked him, "What are you seeking?" "I am seeking my brothers," he said; "tell me, please, where they are pasturing the flock." The man said, "They have gone away, for I heard them say, `Let us go to Dothan.'" So Joseph went after his brothers, and found them at Dothan. They saw him from a distance, and before he came near to them, they conspired to kill him. They said to one another, "Here comes this dreamer. Come now, let us kill him and throw him into one of the pits; then we shall say that a wild animal has devoured him, and we shall see what will become of his dreams." But when Reuben heard it, he delivered him out of their hands, saying, "Let us not take his life." Reuben said to them, "Shed no blood; throw him into this pit here in the wilderness, but lay no hand on him" -- that he might rescue him out of their hand and restore him to his father. So when Joseph came to his brothers, they stripped him of his robe, the long robe with sleeves that he wore; and they took him and threw him into a pit. The pit was empty; there was no water in it.
Then they sat down to eat; and looking up they saw a caravan of Ishmaelites coming from Gilead, with their camels carrying gum, balm, and resin, on their way to carry it down to Egypt. Then Judah said to his brothers, "What profit is it if we kill our brother and conceal his blood? Come, let us sell him to the Ishmaelites, and not lay our hands on him, for he is our brother, our own flesh." And his brothers agreed. When some Midianite traders passed by, they drew Joseph up, lifting him out of the pit, and sold him to the Ishmaelites for twenty pieces of silver. And they took Joseph to Egypt.
Reflection: Some of the stories in the Bible are disturbing.  What do you think of this story?  It has family drama, jealousy, greed, hatred and laziness in it.  All of these things are very real and present in the world today.  Do you believe that God can work through all of the disturbing things in our world and create good?  How can we keep our hearts away from the darkness and follow the light?
Collect: Grant, O Lord, that as your Son Jesus Christ prayed for his enemies on the cross, so we may have grace to forgive those who wrongfully or scornfully use us, that we ourselves may be able to receive your forgiveness; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Saturday, March 14
Scripture: Psalm 103:1–12

1 Bless the Lord, O my soul, *
and all that is within me, bless his holy Name.

2 Bless the Lord, O my soul, *
and forget not all his benefits.
3 He forgives all your sins *
and heals all your infirmities;
4 He redeems your life from the grave *
and crowns you with mercy and loving-kindness;
5 He satisfies you with good things, *
and your youth is renewed like an eagle's.
6 The Lord executes righteousness *
and judgment for all who are oppressed.
7 He made his ways known to Moses *
and his works to the children of Israel.
8 The Lord is full of compassion and mercy, *
slow to anger and of great kindness.
9 He will not always accuse us, *
nor will he keep his anger for ever.
10 He has not dealt with us according to our sins, *
nor rewarded us according to our wickedness.
11 For as the heavens are high above the earth, *
so is his mercy great upon those who fear him.
12 As far as the east is from the west, *
so far has he removed our sins from us.
Reflection: Taize singing is a very simple and repetitive style, sort of like a chant.  The beginning words of this song are a very popular Taize song.  The idea is to repeat it over and over and over and over and just let it clear your mind and penetrate your heart.  Try saying this over and over again “Bless the Lord my soul and bless God’s holy name.  Bless the Lord my soul who leads me into life.”

Monday, March 16
Scripture: 2 Kings 5:1–15b
Naaman, commander of the army of the king of Aram, was a great man and in high favor with his master, because by him the Lord had given victory to Aram. The man, though a mighty warrior, suffered from leprosy. Now the Arameans on one of their raids had taken a young girl captive from the land of Israel, and she served Naaman's wife. She said to her mistress, "If only my lord were with the prophet who is in Samaria! He would cure him of his leprosy." So Naaman went in and told his lord just what the girl from the land of Israel had said. And the king of Aram said, "Go then, and I will send along a letter to the king of Israel."
He went, taking with him ten talents of silver, six thousand shekels of gold, and ten sets of garments. He brought the letter to the king of Israel, which read, "When this letter reaches you, know that I have sent to you my servant Naaman, that you may cure him of his leprosy." When the king of Israel read the letter, he tore his clothes and said, "Am I God, to give death or life, that this man sends word to me to cure a man of his leprosy? Just look and see how he is trying to pick a quarrel with me."
But when Elisha the man of God heard that the king of Israel had torn his clothes, he sent a message to the king, "Why have you torn your clothes? Let him come to me, that he may learn that there is a prophet in Israel." So Naaman came with his horses and chariots, and halted at the entrance of Elisha's house. Elisha sent a messenger to him, saying, "Go, wash in the Jordan seven times, and your flesh shall be restored and you shall be clean." But Naaman became angry and went away, saying, "I thought that for me he would surely come out, and stand and call on the name of the Lord his God, and would wave his hand over the spot, and cure the leprosy! Are not Abana and Pharpar, the rivers of Damascus, better than all the waters of Israel? Could I not wash in them, and be clean?" He turned and went away in a rage. But his servants approached and said to him, "Father, if the prophet had commanded you to do something difficult, would you not have done it? How much more, when all he said to you was, `Wash, and be clean'?" So he went down and immersed himself seven times in the Jordan, according to the word of the man of God; his flesh was restored like the flesh of a young boy, and he was clean.
Then he returned to the man of God, he and all his company; he came and stood before him and said, “Now I know that there is no God in all the earth except in Israel.”
Reflection: As an outsider reading this story it seems ridiculous that Naaman almost didn’t follow the simple instructions Elisha gave him and almost missed out on healing, but pride and arrogance is something I think we can all relate to.  Have you ever missed out on something because you thought you were too good for it or it was beneath you or you didn’t like the other people doing it?  What kind of opportunities, friendships, conversations and glimpses of God are we missing because we aren’t willing to be open to different situations?  How can you challenge yourself to go outside your comfort zone and be more open?

Tuesday, March 17
St. Patrick was not actually Irish.  He was captured, taken to Ireland and forced to work as a slave when he was 16 years old.  He eventually escaped, when back to Britain, became a Christian, was educated and ordained and then felt a calling to go back to Ireland.  He actually went back to the place where he was held captive and forced to be a servant.  He spread Christianity across Ireland and now we wear green and have parades to honor him. When things feel hopeless, difficult and even impossible, hold on because you never know where God may be calling you to bring hope.
Collect: Almighty God, in your providence you chose your servant Patrick to be the apostle to the Irish people, to bring those who were wandering in darkness and error to the true light and knowledge of you: Grant us so to walk in that way that we may come at last to the light of everlasting life; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever.  Amen. 

Wednesday, March 18
Scripture: Psalm 78:1–6
1 Hear my teaching, O my people; *
incline your ears to the words of my mouth.

2 I will open my mouth in a parable; *
I will declare the mysteries of ancient times.

3 That which we have heard and known,
and what our forefathers have told us, *
we will not hide from their children.

4 We will recount to generations to come
the praiseworthy deeds and the power of the Lord, *
and the wonderful works he has done.

5 He gave his decrees to Jacob
and established a law for Israel, *
which he commanded them to teach their children;

6 That the generations to come might know,
and the children yet unborn; *
that they in their turn might tell it to their children;

Reflection: This Psalm is about passing on the stories of God to future generations.  At some point someone invited or brought you to church, maybe a parent, grandparent, relative or friend.  Ask them why they did.  Why do they want you to know these stories about God?  What do the stories mean to them?
Collect: Give ear to our prayers, O Lord, and direct the way of your servants in safety under your protection, that, amid all the changes of our earthly pilgrimage, we may be guarded by your mighty aid; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Thursday, March 19
This is the feast day (or day we recognize) St. Joseph, or the dad in the Christmas story.  Have you ever noticed that Joseph never says a word in the Gospels?  It makes me think of my dad.  He was pretty quiet when I was growing up.  He told lots of jokes at parties and worked long hours as a salesman but when he came home he was quiet.  That was hard for me because I feel connected to people through conversation and hearing about their lives.  My dad and I have great conversations now and I am thankful for that.  Part of being in a family is realizing that everyone has different ways of communicating and we have to work together to find ways to feel connected and express our love. 
In his blog post “St. Joseph, a Man of Silence” Father Mike Marsh writes: “
Throughout the Gospels Joseph never says a word. The gospel writers do not record one word coming from the mouth of Joseph. His silence is not, however, simply the absence of words. It is an inner silence that creates space and place. True silence – Joseph type silence – is always about presence. It is the silence of Divine Presence that fills, encourages, and sustains Joseph, enabling him to meet the physical realities, trust the night mysteries, and perform the daytime obligations.”
As your prayer this night I encourage you to take some time to be silent and be present to the Holy Spirit in the room with you.

Friday, March 20
Scripture: Mark 12:28–34
One of the scribes came near and heard Jesus and the Sadducees disputing with one another, and seeing that Jesus answered them well, he asked him, “Which commandment is the first of all?” Jesus answered, “The first is, ‘Hear, O Israel: the Lord our God, the Lord is one; you shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength.’ The second is this, ‘You shall love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no other commandment greater than these.” Then the scribe said to him, “You are right, Teacher; you have truly said that ‘he is one, and besides him there is no other’; and ‘to love him with all the heart, and with all the understanding, and with all the strength,’ and ‘to love one’s neighbor as oneself,’ —this is much more important than all whole burnt offerings and sacrifices.” When Jesus saw that he answered wisely, he said to him, “You are not far from the kingdom of God.” After that no one dared to ask him any question.
Reflection: There are so many books on theology (or the study of God) and religion.  There are so many sermons preached, so many different churches and so many people who want to tell you what Christianity is all about.  But in this scripture passage we hear this simple instruction: love God and love your neighbor.  This is what we need to know and what we need to do.  How are you loving God and loving your neighbor? 
Prayer: Thank you God for loving us; help us to love you and our neighbors every day.  Amen.

Saturday, March 21
It is spring and it is still Lent.  I think this poem by Wendell Berry (Sabbaths 2011) captures both.  Sometimes poetry is long and confusing.  If this feels that way, I invite you to just notice a word or phrase that stands out to you.  Reflect on that.
New come, we took fields
from the forest, clearing, breaking
the steep slopes. And this was
a fall from a kind of grace:
from the forest in its long Sabbath,
dependent only upon
the Genius of this place, to the field
dependent upon us, our work,
and our failure first and last
to keep peace between
the naked soil and the rain.
From the laws of the First Former
we fell to the place deformed.
The hard rains fell then
into our history, from grace
to fate upon our gullied land.
We numbered the years, not many,
until the forest took back
the failed fields with their scars
unhealed and long in healing,
our toil forfeit to the trees
of a new generation: locust,
cedar, box elder, elm,
and thorn. In spring the redbud
and wild plum, white and pink
on the abandoned slopes, granted
such beauty as we might
have thought forgiving.
By leaving it alone, we are
in a manner forgiven. And yet
we must wait long, long–
how much longer than we
will live?–for the return of what
is gone, not of the past
forever lost, but of health,
the promise of life in and
remade finally whole.
Left alone, the “pioneer
generation” of trees gives way
to the oaks, hickories, maples,
beeches, poplars of the lasting
forest.
By keeping intact
its gift of self-renewal, not
as our belonging, but asking how
we might belong to it,
what we might use of it
for ourselves, leaving it whole,
we may come to live in its
time, in which our lives will pass
as pass the lives of birds
within the lives of trees.
Collect: O God, you know us to be set in the midst of so many and great dangers, that by reason of the frailty of our nature we cannot always stand upright: Grant us such strength and protection as may support us in all dangers, and carry us through all temptations; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Monday, March 23
Scripture: John 4:43–54
When the two days were over, Jesus went from that place to Galilee (for Jesus himself had testified that a prophet has no honor in the prophet’s own country). When he came to Galilee, the Galileans welcomed him, since they had seen all that he had done in Jerusalem at the festival; for they too had gone to the festival.
Then he came again to Cana in Galilee where he had changed the water into wine. Now there was a royal official whose son lay ill in Capernaum. When he heard that Jesus had come from Judea to Galilee, he went and begged him to come down and heal his son, for he was at the point of death. Then Jesus said to him, “Unless you see signs and wonders you will not believe.” The official said to him, “Sir, come down before my little boy dies.” Jesus said to him, “Go; your son will live.” The man believed the word that Jesus spoke to him and started on his way. As he was going down, his slaves met him and told him that his child was alive. So he asked them the hour when he began to recover, and they said to him, “Yesterday at one in the afternoon the fever left him.” The father realized that this was the hour when Jesus had said to him, “Your son will live.” So he himself believed, along with his whole household. Now this was the second sign that Jesus did after coming from Judea to Galilee.
Reflection: There are many stories of healing in the Bible and when people witness or experience the healing they believe that Jesus is the son of God.  Here we are over 2,000 years later and we are called to believe without seeing Jesus walking around healing people.  This can be hard, especially when we so desperately want Jesus to heal us or someone we love.  When Jesus died on the cross it was for all of us, to know that God is greater than our suffering and that in the end everything will be ok.  When have you felt God’s healing presence in your life? Ask a family member, friend or someone at church and together we can have our own collection of healing stories.  Maybe not as direct and dramatic as what we read in the Bible, maybe more like a time when you felt lonely and then knew God was with you and knew it was ok.  Or a time when a situation seemed impossible but looking back you see the ways in which God was with you. 

Tuesday, March 24
This is the feast day of Oscar Romero.  We named our son after him.  He was a Bishop in El Salvador and bravely spoke against the violent injustices and oppression of the poor he witnessed.  He was shot and killed as the result of his bold words and actions in favor of the poor and disadvantaged.  For him, the Bible is clear that faith and justice are bound together.  Here is a quote from him (ignatiansolidarity.net):
The transcendence that the church preaches is not alienation; it is not going to heaven to think about eternal life and forget about the problems on earth. It’s a transcendence from the human heart. It is entering into the reality of a child, of the poor, of those wearing rags, of the sick, of a hovel, of a shack. It is going to share with them. And from the very heart of misery, of this situation, to transcend it, to elevate it, to promote it, and to say to them, “You aren’t trash. You aren’t marginalized.” It is to say exactly the opposite, “You are valuable.”
Reflection: As Christians how do we live out the call of Christ to the “least of these” or those without privileges and comforts? How can we let the people we encounter know that they “aren’t trash” but instead are valuable?

Wednesday, March 25
Today is called The Annunciation of Our Lord Jesus Christ to the Blessed Virgin Mary.  If you don’t know what that means, look at a calendar.  Today is 9 months until Christmas … that means Mary is pregnant and this is how she finds out:

Scripture: Luke 1:26-38

In the sixth month the angel Gabriel was sent by God to a town in Galilee called Nazareth, to a virgin engaged to a man whose name was Joseph, of the house of David. The virgin's name was Mary. And he came to her and said, "Greetings, favored one! The Lord is with you." But she was much perplexed by his words and pondered what sort of greeting this might be. The angel said to her, "Do not be afraid, Mary, for you have found favor with God. And now, you will conceive in your womb and bear a son, and you will name him Jesus. He will be great, and will be called the Son of the Most High, and the Lord God will give to him the throne of his ancestor David. He will reign over the house of Jacob forever, and of his kingdom there will be no end." Mary said to the angel, "How can this be, since I am a virgin?" The angel said to her, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you; therefore the child to be born will be holy; he will be called Son of God. And now, your relative Elizabeth in her old age has also conceived a son; and this is the sixth month for her who was said to be barren. For nothing will be impossible with God." Then Mary said, "Here am I, the servant of the Lord; let it be with me according to your word." Then the angel departed from her.
Reflection: In our evening readings of the Bible my kids always point out that when angels come they almost always say “do not be afraid.”  If you were Mary and this happened to you would you have been afraid?  How can we better trust in God and live with less fear?
Collect: Pour your grace into our hearts, O Lord, that we who have known the incarnation of your Son Jesus Christ, announced by an angel to the Virgin Mary, may by his cross and passion be brought to the glory of his resurrection; who lives and reigns with you, in the unity of the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen.

Thursday, March 26
Some of the collects may use old language or unfamiliar words but they are actually very simple prayers that anyone can write.  As your devotion today, write your own collect. These instructions are from https://episcopaldiocesefortworth.org/prayer-formats-collect/
Writing a Collect
A collect is a brief prayer that brings together several ideas succinctly. Though not a common word now, it’s just the noun version of the verb “to collect.”
A collect often follows a format something like this:
Address – the prayer begins with a name for God and often a description of God’s character or actions.
Petition & Purpose – this section asks for something and also often include a ‘so that’ type of clause, to make it clear what we hope will result from the petition being answered. The idea is to think about why we’re asking for something.
Praise – the last part of the prayer will usually offer praise to God or state the basis on which we’re making the request.
Here is one example of a basic collect format. Try writing a collect in response to something you notice during your day.
O God, you are ________ :
Start with who you know God to be – attributes of character or past actions

We ask ____________ ,
Keeping in mind who God is, make your request in line with that knowledge

so that ____________ ; 
What for? What are you hoping will result?

through ___________.
Part of our confidence in approaching God comes from remembering that Jesus connects us


Friday, March 27
Scripture: John 7:1–2,10,25–30
After this Jesus went about in Galilee. He did not wish to go about in Judea because the Jews were looking for an opportunity to kill him. Now the Jewish festival of Booths was near.
But after his brothers had gone to the festival, then he also went, not publicly but as it were in secret.
Now some of the people of Jerusalem were saying, “Is not this the man whom they are trying to kill? And here he is, speaking openly, but they say nothing to him! Can it be that the authorities really know that this is the Messiah? Yet we know where this man is from; but when the Messiah comes, no one will know where he is from.” Then Jesus cried out as he was teaching in the temple, “You know me, and you know where I am from. I have not come on my own. But the one who sent me is true, and you do not know him. I know him, because I am from him, and he sent me.” Then they tried to arrest him, but no one laid hands on him, because his hour had not yet come.
Reflection: Why is everyone so mad at Jesus? In her book The Time is Now, Joan Chittister writes:
The prophet is loud, clear, and nonviolent.  There is nothing self-serving in the actions of the prophet.  On the contrary, prophets almost always suffer loss of social status and an increase of personal rejection, not to mention the legal punishment of the governments they confront.  They pay the social cost imposed by societies still blind to their own violence, yet unconscious of their own social sins.  And they do it to expose the systemic roots of the violence they confront. (page 74) 
In other words, prophets (especially those seeking to follow in the footsteps of Jesus) call out society for what they are doing wrong.  This is hard for people to hear, especially those who are benefiting from the way things are being done. 

Saturday, March 28
Scripture: John 7:37–52
On the last day of the festival, the great day, while Jesus was standing there, he cried out, “Let anyone who is thirsty come to me, and let the one who believes in me drink. As the scripture has said, ‘Out of the believer’s heart shall flow rivers of living water.’” Now he said this about the Spirit, which believers in him were to receive; for as yet there was no Spirit, because Jesus was not yet glorified.
When they heard these words, some in the crowd said, “This is really the prophet.” Others said, “This is the Messiah.” But some asked, “Surely the Messiah does not come from Galilee, does he? Has not the scripture said that the Messiah is descended from David and comes from Bethlehem, the village where David lived?” So there was a division in the crowd because of him. Some of them wanted to arrest him, but no one laid hands on him.
Then the temple police went back to the chief priests and Pharisees, who asked them, “Why did you not arrest him?” The police answered, “Never has anyone spoken like this!” Then the Pharisees replied, “Surely you have not been deceived too, have you? Has any one of the authorities or of the Pharisees believed in him? But this crowd, which does not know the law—they are accursed.” Nicodemus, who had gone to Jesus before, and who was one of them, asked, “Our law does not judge people without first giving them a hearing to find out what they are doing, does it?” They replied, “Surely you are not also from Galilee, are you? Search and you will see that no prophet is to arise from Galilee.”
Reflection: How do you feel when there is conflict?  Some people love it and join in.   Some people get really upset and run away.  Some people get nasty and maybe even violent.  Usually when I am around conflict my stomach kind of hurts, my heart beats faster and my hands get sweaty.  I try to take deep breaths, stay focused and speak clearly.  Jesus was the center of a lot of conflict.  People were confused and threatened by him.  How does Jesus handle conflict?  How can we practice knowing when to speak up and when to stay silent?  How can we be careful with our words even when our heart beats fast?

Monday, March 30
Scripture: Psalm 23
1 The Lord is my shepherd; *
I shall not be in want.
2 He makes me lie down in green pastures *
and leads me beside still waters.
3 He revives my soul *
and guides me along right pathways for his Name's sake.
4 Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I shall fear no evil; *
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
5 You spread a table before me in the presence of those who trouble me; *
you have anointed my head with oil,
and my cup is running over.
6 Surely your goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, *
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.
Reflection: Why do you think this Psalm is so popular?  When I was doing an internship as a hospital chaplain I thought it was lovely how so many of the elderly people I visited had a piece of scripture or a hymn that they recited to themselves for comfort.  Even if their memory was fading, often they could still recite something like this Psalm 23 word for word.   It got me thinking about what I wanted to stick in my memory for comfort in my final days.  Is there a verse of scripture or a hymn that brings you comfort?

Tuesday, March 31
Scripture: John 8:21–30
Jesus said to the Jews, “I am going away, and you will search for me, but you will die in your sin. Where I am going, you cannot come.” Then the Jews said, “Is he going to kill himself? Is that what he means by saying, ‘Where I am going, you cannot come’?” He said to them, “You are from below, I am from above; you are of this world, I am not of this world. I told you that you would die in your sins, for you will die in your sins unless you believe that I am he.” They said to him, “Who are you?” Jesus said to them, “Why do I speak to you at all? I have much to say about you and much to condemn; but the one who sent me is true, and I declare to the world what I have heard from him.” They did not understand that he was speaking to them about the Father. So Jesus said, “When you have lifted up the Son of Man, then you will realize that I am he, and that I do nothing on my own, but I speak these things as the Father instructed me. And the one who sent me is with me; he has not left me alone, for I always do what is pleasing to him.” As he was saying these things, many believed in him.
Reflection: There are many stories about people not understanding who Jesus is and Jesus trying to explain it through signs, sermons and teachings in the Gospels.  These verses of scripture today emphasize the oneness of Jesus and God.  We believe in a Triune God, which means we believe that God is Father, Son and Holy Spirit, but even though we use these three words, they are all one.  Inevitably, all attempts to explain this idea of 3 in 1 and 1 in 3 fall short.  For every metaphor for the Trinity there is someone criticizing that metaphor for the ways it fails to truly capture the Trinity.   Maybe this is what Jesus is trying to say when he says “you are from this world, I am not of this world.”  Maybe we can never fully explain this divine mystery, maybe our words will always fall short and maybe that’s ok.  There is something really freeing about accepting a mystery and not trying to explain it away.  I love that as Episcopalians we don’t just accept the mystery and the unknown, but we celebrate it and find beauty in it.  It’s one thing to explain how God is present in the wafer and wine of Eucharist, it is another thing to kneel beside your fellow Christians and lift your hands for the mysterious sustenance it gives our souls. 
Collect: Almighty God, through the incarnate Word you have caused us to be born anew of an imperishable and eternal seed: Look with compassion upon those who are being prepared for Holy Baptism, and grant that they may be built as living stones into a spiritual temple acceptable to you; through Jesus Christ our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.

Wednesday, April 1
Scripture: Canticle 13    
Glory to you, Lord God of our fathers; *
you are worthy of praise; glory to you.
Glory to you for the radiance of your holy Name; *
we will praise you and highly exalt you for ever.
Glory to you in the splendor of your temple; *
on the throne of your majesty, glory to you.
Glory to you, seated between the Cherubim; *
we will praise you and highly exalt you for ever.
Glory to you, beholding the depths; *
in the high vault of heaven, glory to you.
Glory to you, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit; *
we will praise you and highly exalt you for ever.

Reflection: This canticle (that we sing in worship) is a nice break from the heaviness of Lent.  It is a time to sing God’s praises.  April Fool’s Day is also a nice break from the heaviness of Lent.  I have some of my biggest laughs when I am raw or emotionally exhausted, so maybe laughter is as much a part of Lent as sadness.  When was the last time you laughed so hard you could barely breathe?  Perhaps our laughter can be a way of singing glory to God from a place deep within our soul without words but only breathless shouts. 

Thursday, April 2

Scripture: Genesis 17:1–8
When Abram was ninety-nine years old, the Lord appeared to Abram, and said to him, “I am God Almighty; walk before me, and be blameless. And I will make my covenant between me and you, and will make you exceedingly numerous.” Then Abram fell on his face; and God said to him, “As for me, this is my covenant with you: You shall be the ancestor of a multitude of nations. No longer shall your name be Abram, but your name shall be Abraham; for I have made you the ancestor of a multitude of nations. I will make you exceedingly fruitful; and I will make nations of you, and kings shall come from you. I will establish my covenant between me and you, and your offspring after you throughout their generations, for an everlasting covenant, to be God to you and to your offspring after you. And I will give to you, and to your offspring after you, the land where you are now an alien, all the land of Canaan, for a perpetual holding; and I will be their God.”

Reflection: Abraham is in three of the major world religions: Judaism, Christianity and Islam.  It’s wild to think of millions of devout believers tracing their roots back to a guy hanging out in the desert thousands of years ago.  In her book Accidental Saints, Nadia Bolz-Weber says, “Never once did Jesus scan the room for the best example of holy living and send that person out to tell others about him. He always sent stumblers and sinners. I find that comforting.”  The same can be said for Old Testament figures.  They had flaws, they were human.  God does amazing things through flawed humans.  Does that bring you comfort?  How is God at work in you not despite your flaws but through your flaws? 

Friday, April 3

Scripture: Psalm 18:1–7
I love you, O Lord my strength, *
Lord my stronghold, my crag, and my haven.
2 My God, my rock in whom I put my trust, *
my shield, the horn of my salvation, and my refuge;
you are worthy of praise.
3 I will call upon the Lord, *
and so shall I be saved from my enemies.
4 The breakers of death rolled over me, *
and the torrents of oblivion made me afraid.
5 The cords of hell entangled me, *
and the snares of death were set for me.
6 I called upon the Lord in my distress *
and cried out to my God for help.
7 He heard my voice from his heavenly dwelling; *
my cry of anguish came to his ears.

Reflection: “Do you pray?”  That was the question my professor asked the class.  We were studying religions of Africa and this was at a state university with no religious ties.  He was a passionate professor and deeply religious but never pushed it onto others.  One woman in her early twenties said “no, I never pray.”  He asked if she believed in a higher power and she said yes. Then he asked if she ever reflected on life or thought about her feelings.  She said yes.  He said “so maybe you do pray.”  Maybe that’s a stretch, but it is true that prayer doesn’t have to be as formulaic or perfectly worded as some may think.  It can be a wordless emotion or a crying out to God in distress like the Psalmist.  Do you pray?  How do you pray? How did you learn to pray?  No matter how we pray I believe that God hears our prayers and cares. 

Saturday, April 4

Scripture: John 11:45–53
Many of the Jews who had come with Mary and had seen what Jesus did, believed in him. But some of them went to the Pharisees and told them what he had done. So the chief priests and the Pharisees called a meeting of the council, and said, “What are we to do? This man is performing many signs. If we let him go on like this, everyone will believe in him, and the Romans will come and destroy both our holy place and our nation.” But one of them, Caiaphas, who was high priest that year, said to them, “You know nothing at all! You do not understand that it is better for you to have one man die for the people than to have the whole nation destroyed.” He did not say this on his own, but being high priest that year he prophesied that Jesus was about to die for the nation, and not for the nation only, but to gather into one the dispersed children of God. So from that day on they planned to put him to death.
Reflection: Why would people kill someone who is doing good things?  Today is the feast day of Martin Luther King Jr.  One of his famous quotes is, “Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.”  How do we be the light in the midst of darkness?  Where do you find courage? 
Collect: Almighty God, by the hand of Moses your servant you led your people out of slavery, and made them free at last: Grant that your Church, following the example of your prophet Martin Luther King, may resist oppression in the name of your love, and may secure for all your children the blessed liberty of the Gospel of Jesus Christ; who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, now and for ever. Amen

Monday, April 6
Collect: Almighty God, whose most dear Son went not up to joy but first he suffered pain, and entered not into glory before he was crucified: Mercifully grant that we, walking in the way of the cross, may find it none other than the way of life and peace; through Jesus Christ your Son our Lord, who lives and reigns with you and the Holy Spirit, one God, for ever and ever. Amen.
Reflection: Yesterday was Palm Sunday and Passion Sunday.  That means that we began the worship service hearing about how the people shouted “Hosanna” and waved palm branches while Jesus entered Jerusalem.  They treated him like royalty.  We wave palm branches and process outside to remember this, but then our worship turns toward the cross as we read the passion, or the story of Jesus’s death on the cross.  What do you think it was like for Jesus to go from hearing shouts of joy and “blessed is the one who comes in the name of the Lord” to then being put on trial and hearing the people yell “crucify him?”  Try saying both out loud “blessed is the one who comes in the name of the Lord” and “crucify him!”  What does that feel like?  Humans are capable of such kindness and love and also such anger and meanness. How do you balance the two in your life?

Tuesday, April 7
Scripture: Psalm 71:1-14
In you, O Lord, have I taken refuge; *
let me never be ashamed.
2 In your righteousness, deliver me and set me free; *
incline your ear to me and save me.
3 Be my strong rock, a castle to keep me safe; *
you are my crag and my stronghold.
4 Deliver me, my God, from the hand of the wicked, *
from the clutches of the evildoer and the oppressor.
5 For you are my hope, O Lord God, *
my confidence since I was young.
6 I have been sustained by you ever since I was born;
from my mother's womb you have been my strength; *
my praise shall be always of you.
7 I have become a portent to many; *
but you are my refuge and my strength.
8 Let my mouth be full of your praise *
and your glory all the day long.
9 Do not cast me off in my old age; *
forsake me not when my strength fails.
10 For my enemies are talking against me, *
and those who lie in wait for my life take counsel together.
11 They say, "God has forsaken him;
go after him and seize him; *
because there is none who will save."
12 O God, be not far from me; *
come quickly to help me, O my God.
13 Let those who set themselves against me be put to shame and be disgraced; *
let those who seek to do me evil be covered with scorn and reproach.
14 But I shall always wait in patience, *
and shall praise you more and more.

Reflection: One of my favorite Lenten disciplines is to keep a journal.  Not the kind where you write about your day so you can remember it later, but the kind where you write your deepest thoughts for no one else to read.  Maybe writing isn’t your thing, drawing works too.  For your devotion today reflect on the word “refuge” and draw whatever comes to mind.  You don’t need to put your name on it or label it, it’s only for you and God to see. 

Wednesday, April 8
Scripture: Hebrews 12:1-3
Since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight and the sin that clings so closely, and let us run with perseverance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus the pioneer and perfecter of our faith, who for the sake of the joy that was set before him endured the cross, disregarding its shame, and has taken his seat at the right hand of the throne of God.
Consider him who endured such hostility against himself from sinners, so that you may not grow weary or lose heart.
Reflection: We are almost at the end of Lent.  Perhaps this has been a time of resisting temptation.  Maybe it has been a time to think about how weak humans can be and how much we need God.  Maybe it has been a stressful time of getting through school and hoping for summer.  Have you heard of the “It Gets Better Project?”  It was started as a way of combating the hopelessness that many LGBTQ+ young people may feel, particularly in their teenage years.  It is a collection of inspiring stories of hope from people who went through difficult times and found joy on the other side.  Sometimes people forget how hard high school can be, they get nostalgic and say it is the best years of your life.  I never say that.  I think it is hard and I wish I could go back to some of those difficult moments and whisper in the ear of my younger self “it gets better.”  How might this scripture reading from Hebrews bring someone encouragement in dark times?  When you look back at your life is there a time you wish you could have told yourself “it gets better?”  When?  In times of struggle try to listen for that voice from your future self.  It does get better …

Maundy Thursday, April 9
Scripture: John 13:1-17, 31b-35
Now before the festival of the Passover, Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart from this world and go to the Father. Having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. The devil had already put it into the heart of Judas son of Simon Iscariot to betray him. And during supper Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going to God, got up from the table, took off his outer robe, and tied a towel around himself. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples' feet and to wipe them with the towel that was tied around him. He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, "Lord, are you going to wash my feet?" Jesus answered, "You do not know now what I am doing, but later you will understand." Peter said to him, "You will never wash my feet." Jesus answered, "Unless I wash you, you have no share with me." Simon Peter said to him, "Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!" Jesus said to him, "One who has bathed does not need to wash, except for the feet, but is entirely clean. And you are clean, though not all of you." For he knew who was to betray him; for this reason he said, "Not all of you are clean."
After he had washed their feet, had put on his robe, and had returned to the table, he said to them, "Do you know what I have done to you? You call me Teacher and Lord--and you are right, for that is what I am. So if I, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another's feet. For I have set you an example, that you also should do as I have done to you. Very truly, I tell you, servants are not greater than their master, nor are messengers greater than the one who sent them. If you know these things, you are blessed if you do them.
"Now the Son of Man has been glorified, and God has been glorified in him. If God has been glorified in him, God will also glorify him in himself and will glorify him at once. Little children, I am with you only a little longer. You will look for me; and as I said to the Jews so now I say to you, `Where I am going, you cannot come.' I give you a new commandment, that you love one another. Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another."
Reflection: I’ve led several week long mission trips with teens and on the last night we always had a foot-washing. The leaders would grab a plastic bin full of warm water and a towel and we would wash the feet of the teens.  Every single time the room filled with tears.  Once I asked them “why the tears?”  They couldn’t explain it and I regretted asking because it was a beautiful Holy Spirit moment not meant to be explained.  Our church does a foot-washing every year at the Maundy Thursday service.  Have you ever had your feet washed by another?  What was it like?  If you do not want to have your feet washed, why do you think that is?  Imagine what it would be like for Jesus to wash your feet. 

Good Friday, April 10
Scripture: Psalm 22
1 My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? *
and are so far from my cry
and from the words of my distress?
2 O my God, I cry in the daytime, but you do not answer; *
by night as well, but I find no rest.
3 Yet you are the Holy One, *
enthroned upon the praises of Israel.
4 Our forefathers put their trust in you; *
they trusted, and you delivered them.

Reflection: In her book Inspired, Rachel Held Evans writes:
Often I hear from readers who left their churches because they had no songs for them to sing after the miscarriage, the shooting, the earthquake, the divorce, the diagnosis, he attack, the bankruptcy.  That American tendency toward triumphalism, of optimism rotted in success, money, and privilege, will infect and sap of substance any faith community that has lost its capacity for “holding space” for those in grief.  As therapists and caregivers explain, to “hold space” for someone is to simply sit with them in their pain, without judgment or solutions, and remain present and attentive no matter the outcome.  The Psalms are, in a sense, God’s way of holding space for us.  They invite us to rejoice, wrestle, cry, complain, offer thanks, and shout obscenities before our Maker without self-consciousness and without fear.  Life is full of the sort of joys and sorrows that don’t resolve neatly in a major key.  God knows that.  The Bible knows that.  Why don’t we?
        It is telling, and extraordinary, that in his most vulnerable moment, Jesus himself turned to the Psalms.  Hanging from a Roman cross between two thieves, while his mother and loved ones watched in shock, he cried, “Eli, Eli lema sabachthani?”
        “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?” (Matthew 27:46).   It’s a cry straight from Psalm 22, the God to whom these words were first spoken, speaking them back in human form.  Three days later, Jesus would rise from the dead, but in that moment, when all hope was lost and the darkness overwhelmed, only poetry would do.” (pgs 110-11)

Holy Saturday, April 11

The church is dark.  The florist will come in and set up the flowers and they will sit in the darkness until our shouts of resurrection joy brighten the dark sanctuary.  Soon it will be flowered dresses, plastic eggs full of candy, instruments and choir, but right now it is dark.  Christ has died.  Try to sit with the darkness for a moment.  Sometimes when unpleasant thoughts come into our mind we grab our phone or turn on the tv or find a way to distract ourselves.  Try to refrain from doing that and let the thoughts pass, almost like you can watch them move through your mind, just sitting with them, finding a word from God in the darkness.







Monday, December 23, 2019

Sermon from Grace and St Stephen’s 12/22/19 Matthew 1:18-25



     “The most joyful event of the season!”  That’s what the glittery gold words on my screen read.  “The most joyful event of the season.”  By season they mean Christmas season so maybe the most joyful event of the Christmas season might be the mass or worship service celebrating the birth of Christ.  Or maybe it is referring to the actual birth of Christ- the indwelling of the Holy Spirit, the taking on of flesh by God the creator of the universe, the proclamation of Emmanuel, the coming of the Prince of Peace, salvation for us all, peace for the world and hope for ages to come … But actually, the glittery gold words weren’t referring to any of those things.  Turns out, “the most joyful event of the season” involves Taylor Swift, James Corden and Jennifer Hudson dressed as cats in the movie based on the famous Broadway musical.  “The most joyful event of the season” is apparently sitting in a theater for two hours watching people dressed as cats dance and sing.  And maybe it is a good movie, but I feel like we can do better as far as joy goes …
          My skepticism continued as I sat in a crowded gymnasium and watched first graders dressed as Christmas trees sing and dance.  It was a lovely little play showcasing the talents and joy of the children.  At the end all the little Christmas trees learn from Santa Claus what Christmas is really about.  Turns out it’s friendship and kindness.  I clapped and smiled along with the rest of the audience but inside my head I was saying “really?  Is it?” 
          As far as pop culture holiday lessons go, few hit the nail on the head as well as the classic Charlie Brown Christmas because it’s difficult to truly capture the joy of Christmas without mention of Jesus.  I get the importance of being sensitive to all backgrounds and beliefs, but I think the secular messages of “what Christmas is all about” or “the most joyful event of the season” are really kind of sad and depressing, even though they may cause a passing nostalgic smile.  If all of the songs, decorations, anticipation, hopes, desperate cries and preparations are really just for a moment of feeling good- we walk away with our hearts longing for more.  Longing for something that cuts through the surface, digs deep within us and speaks to our souls. 
          Isaiah and Matthew have a different idea of “the most joyful event of the season” … or even “the most joyful event of human existence.”  Isaiah describes the sign God will send to “weary mortals” and the words echo across the pages of our Bible and over hundreds of years and then catch the ear of a troubled and confused man in a dream.  “Emmanuel”  “God with us” - convinces Joseph to take a chance on faith.  Hundreds of years later it echoes here in this space.  The hope of all creation, salvation for all of us, an answer to our longing - “Emmanuel … God with us.” 
          Theologian Elizabeth Johnson writes, “Christian faith is grounded on the experience that God who is Spirit, at work in the tragic and beautiful world to vivify and renew all creatures through the gracious power of her indwelling, liberating love, is present yet again through the very particular history of one human being, Jesus of Nazareth.  The one who is divine love, gift, and friend becomes manifest in time a concrete gestalt … According to the witness of Scripture, Jesus is a genuine Spirit-phenomenon, conceived, inspired, sent, hovered over, guided and risen from the dead … Through his human history the Spirit who pervades the universe becomes concretely present in a small bit of it … In a word, Jesus is Emmanuel, God with us … In the circle of life where Christ’s way is followed, a new possibility of shalom, of redemptive wholeness, is made experientially available and can be tasted in anticipation, even now, as the struggle of history goes on.” [1]
          Sounds pretty great … I  mean it’s no dancing cats, but … Salvation, joy, peace, redemption, Holy Spirit dwelling on earth, God in flesh, Emmanuel  … that’s where I am placing my hope. 
          I wonder what all of this meant to Joseph.  He had a very important decision to make.  The woman he was engaged to was pregnant and not by him.  That in itself is cause for heart break, loss of trust and anger, but at the time it also could mean severe punishment for this young woman he hoped to wed.   Shame, disgrace, even punishment by death were possibilities.  It sounds as though he weighed heavily his options and looked for what he deemed to be the most reasonable and compassionate option … until an angel showed up in a dream and reason went out the window.  Confusion, indecision, perhaps agony and grief gave way to faith and enlightenment.  That’s not always an easy step to make.
          As we have been studying the book of Job in Wednesday night Bible Study and reflecting on faith in difficult times I have been thinking about difficult times in my life.  There have been times when confusion, doubts, fear and anxiety filled my mind and my soul.  Times when I have sat with the door closed and wondered who I am, who God is, how do we cope with the pain of the world, how do we find assurance when doubt is so strong?  I have to say that in those moments of darkness, wrestling, grief and turmoil I have always known God is near … even when I don’t know what that means.  I don’t think it’s because I have some super faith or extra wisdom.  I just think it’s just practice.
          I have been praying over and over again on Sunday mornings, at bedtime, on walks and everywhere else throughout my life.  I have been listening to scriptures read, sermons preached and the faith stories of others.  I have been singing the words of hymns I don’t always comprehend in the moment.  I have looked at art dedicated to God, stared at scenes depicted in stained glass, lit candles, hung Christmas lights, witnessed incredible acts of love and read theology books.  Somehow, in all of that, something got inside.  In all of that practicing, a belief crept deep into my soul and set up camp.  And when all seems lost and my stomach churns and my soul seems unsteady I see the lantern lit and I somehow know “Emmanuel” God with us, even though I can’t explain it. 
            I remember a conversation some years ago with a church member trying to persuade me to put Christmas carols in the Advent bulletins.  She said “we all know what happens anyway, why wait.”  It’s true.  We know the songs we will sing on Tuesday night, the baby that will be placed in the manger, the familiar scripture that will be read and the order the candles will be lit.  But we keep telling the story anyway … over and over again.  We wait, we anticipate, we prepare and we hope.  And somewhere in that process our hearts are cracked open to the good news of Emmanuel, God with us.  As convincing now as it was when Isaiah said it and Joseph dreamed it. 
          Julian of Norwich writes, “For it is God’s will that we have true delight with him in our salvation, and in it God wants us to be greatly comforted and strengthened, and so joyfully God wishes our souls to be occupied with God’s grace.  For we are God’s bliss, because God endlessly delights in us; and so with God’s grace shall we delight in God.  All that God does for us and has done and will do was never expense or labour to God … beginning at the sweet Incarnation and lasting until his blessed Resurrection on Easter morning.  So long did the labour and expense of our redemption last, in which deed God always and endlessly rejoices.”[2] 
          I love that image of God sharing in our true delight, “joyfully occupying our souls.”  The most joyful event of the season, not just for us but for our God longing to be with us.  God with us, joyfully redeeming us, dwelling in time, setting up camp in our hearts. It’s coming.  So let’s practice, let’s prepare, let’s sing our Advent hymns and flood our hearts with anticipation.  Let us raise our hands in hope because Jesus is coming … and that is a joy that will last longer than a nostalgic memory, longer than a movie, longer than a twinkling light, it is an eternal joy-   Emmanuel- God with us.  Amen.



[1] Johnson, Elizabeth.  She Who Is: The Mystery of God in Feminist Theological Discourse. The Crossroad Publishing Company, 2002.  Pp. 150-151.
[2] Colledge, Edmund and Walsh, James, eds.  Julian of Norwich: Showings. Paulist Pres, 1978.  Pp 219.  (edited pronouns)

Wednesday, December 4, 2019

I don't hate being a youth pastor


     It's true. I don't hate being the youth pastor. Perhaps I should explain. I got my first job as a youth director at a United Methodist Church when I had just turned 20 years old. I was working three jobs, paying rent and going to college full time. I was so excited to cut back to only two jobs because I was getting a salary. I would be paid $10,000 a year for 20 hours per week and to celebrate I went to the mall and bought myself two new outfits. I learned a lot at that job and had a lot of fun. I cringe now at some of the mistakes I made never due to bad intentions but rather lack of experience and education. Wonderful parents, staff and pastors guided me along and we had a good time.
     My second year of seminary I anxiously awaited my field education placement. This was my chance to test my skills as a pastor and learn about leading a congregation. When I got the call telling me I would be a youth leader I was a little disappointed. I wanted to be seen as more than a young adult assumed to have lots of energy and relatability, I wanted to be seen as a pastor. I remember talking about this with fellow seminarians who were feeling the same frustration. We felt like we were a cheap option for churches that needed youth ministers. I ended up having a lot of relevant experience in that position and getting to know some wonderful young people.
     I would find myself in youth ministry again when I served as an associate pastor before I got appointed as the sole pastor of a mid- sized congregation. I learned a lot from my youth leader experiences and got to work with some amazing teens and parents. I cried at baccalaureate services and laughed until I cried at silly lock-in games. Even when I was the only pastor of a church I still found myself taking teens on a week long mission trip, meeting them for coffee after school and going to high school sporting events to cheer them on.
     I will say though that when I left my associate pastor position where I was responsible for the youth program I was relieved to be done with some things. I was sad to say goodbye to the wonderful congregation, but I was happy to say goodbye to scrambling for chaperones and drivers, tracking down permission slips, having teens flake on scheduled meetings and events, trying to order the right amount of pizza and sleeping on gym floors.
     Now that I am back in youth ministry I find myself doing some of those things again (we had two leftover pizzas at the last event so I'm still working on that). But I also know myself much better now. I am not the hyper youth pastor chasing kids with a nerf gun and high fiving my way down the halls. That is so not me. I am however the person to go to with theological questions, emotions and doubts. And they have them. I am the person who geuinely wants to know what their lives are like and how they experience the world. I am the person who cares about them very much and believes their faith development and connection to their faith community is one of the most important things for their life journey.
     So, I am not afraid to hang back when they all run around to play some high energy game and have a deep discussion with the ones not participating. I don't need to pretend to be cool or hyper or into Youtube. They want someone to listen, they want to ask the big questions, they want to feel connected to each other and God. I get that.
     It is weird being introduced as a “youth pastor” since it feels a little like I haven't moved on since that first job 18 years ago. I love preaching, providing pastoral care to all ages, leading services and leading adult small groups and I also get to do all of those things. I also love working with the teens. Sure, part of that is because in every church I have worked in it just so happens the teens have been particularly insightful, open and awesome. But also I think it's just like with all ministry, it's ok to play to our strengths, be who we genuinely are and admit when we are sick of sleeping on gym floors.
     So, seminarians take heart when you get your field ed placement and find that a church sees you as a cheap way to get a youth pastor. It may feel like you aren't being taken seriously as a pastor and only your young age is being considered, but it is an opportunity to do important, influential and fulfilling work for the Kingdom of God … plus there's pizza.

Tuesday, November 26, 2019

What if ... we relax?


     Mornings are a bit of a struggle for my youngest. He wakes up and declares that he hates school and is not going. I tell him that he is and then he tells me he is sick. Unfortunately he has been picking up every kindergarten virus going around so he has been sick quite a bit. When he isn't coughing, sneezing and tugging at an infected ear he has belly aches and head aches. I stopped packing him fruit juice, picked snacks that are gentle on his tummy and advised him to drink lots of water, but none of that seemed to help. He started saying things like “what if I have to go to the bathroom and I am somewhere without a bathroom?” or “what if I miss you so much that I freak out and get in trouble for crying?”
     The “what ifs” are not uncommon in our house, but it wasn't until I was reading the National PTA magazine's article about back to school anxiety and how it manifests that I figured out the problem. The poor guy was anxious. I wondered why and then looked in the mirror. I get stomach aches and head aches frequently and I know they are often the result of tension and anxiety. I too consider “what ifs” especially before I am in a new situation. I also like to have my family near and feel best when at least one person I know is present. Maybe my kid's anxiety is genetic but if it isn't caused by then it certainly is exacerbated by me and the behaviors I model.
     As I was considering this, I attended a really thought provoking and informative workshop at the local hospital about suicide and also participated in a discussion with the youth group I lead and a therapist about mental illness and various issues teens face. With alarmingly high rates of suicide in our county everyone is scrambling to figure out the cause. Of course technology and phones are always part of the conversation when adults are having it and there probably is something to that. Things like: bullying, social isolation, academic standards, extra-curriculars and a variety of other concerns are also usually raised. All of these are important but I also find myself thinking maybe we all need to calm down.
     I hate being told to calm down and it's an even harder phrase to say right now when I could be accused of quoting Taylor Swift, but maybe we need to say it to ourselves. Mental illnesses like anxiety and depression are not solved by someone just “cheering up” and professional therapy and medications are important treatments. I do not mean to make light of them. I have had panic attacks and they are terrible and certainly not helped by anyone condescendingly saying just to “calm down.” But I do think that regarding our general manner of being in and relating to the world, it wouldn't hurt to relax more.
     I recently listened to Marc Maron's interview with Tony Hale on Marc's WTF podcast and in the interview Marc does a great job digging into who Tony is and getting at his struggles and deepest identity. I love this podcast because I love digging into people and Marc is so good at that. What I have found from listening is that so many of these very famous people who would be traditionally labeled as “successful” have so many self-doubts, insecurities and fears. Tony Hale was no different. He talked about an appearance he did on Conan O'Brien. He said that after the show he was backstage talking to Andy Richter and he told Andy that he was disappointed in himself and how the appearance went. He felt that he wasn't funny and everyone would say he wasn't any good. Andy looked at him, smiled and said “it doesn't actually matter … we are all like paper sailboats out on the ocean … eventually we just go away."  His words made a big impact on Tony.
     I try to remember that when I am frantically cleaning the house before company comes. I pause and ask myself “does it really matter if they think I am not good at keeping my house clean?” No, it doesn't. Sometimes it seems like everybody is freaking out and there are certainly important and serious issues in the world to concern ourselves with but also sometimes we just need to unclench our facial muscles, breathe deeply and see ourselves as the paper sailboats that we are.

Monday, October 21, 2019

Sermon from Grace and St. Stephen's Luke 18:1-8


         A typical morning for me starts with me saying “brush your teeth, get dressed, eat your breakfast, get your shoes on …” and repeating this many, many times.  The truth is, parenting requires a lot of trying to get people to do stuff: chores, manners, cleaning up, homework, going to bed.  Occasionally I get to intersperse some permission giving which feels good: “yes, you can have candy” “no, you don’t have to go”  “sure have a water balloon fight in the backyard in 60 degrees with your new shoes on.” 

          These persuasive efforts do not end with parenting.  “Would you like to join the PTA?”  “Are you able to volunteer Friday morning at 7:30 am to put together tiny buildings and streets for kindergartners to ride tricycles through and learn about safety?” or “I think you would really like confirmation class” “you should try youth group it’s really fun” “I hope you had a good visit and will come back to our church.”  Some days I feel exhausted from trying to get people to do stuff.  I try my best to be likable, sincere and kind to help the causes I believe in, yet I still hear, receive, and feel rejection.  What makes it difficult is that these are things I really believe in.  I’m not trying to persuade people to try the cookies I made, I’m trying to raise good humans, help the public school my children attend, help young people connect with each other and God and grow this wonderful church where I have experienced the grace and love of God. And some days it all feels like I have a tiny little fork and am chipping away at a huge mountain. 


          As I hear this Gospel story about the widow, I wonder if that is how she ever felt.  Over and over again she asked the judge to vindicate her.  Did she too get tired of trying to get people to do stuff?  Did she get sick of the judge who has no regard for anyone?  Did she go to bed and say “enough is enough.  I’m out?”  Did her friends tease her for wasting her time?  We don’t know. We don’t even know if she tried to be likable, charming and sincere.  It actually sounds like she was not that likable.  The judge eventually says yes because he is afraid she will “wear him out.” One translation I read says he is afraid she will give him a black eye.  I think it’s meant to be a little comical.  The important and powerful judge who doesn’t care about anyone, and the widow, who at that time is seen as lowly, weak and powerless.  And she annoys him to the point of concession. 
  
        While we may not know if she ever thought of quitting or why she persisted or even if her cause was just (incidentally the text never says whether she or her opponent is right or wrong in their disagreement), one thing that is clear and we know for sure is that she is a widow.  Which means she has been through some stuff.  She knows struggle, she knows pain, life has not been easy and probably not at all like she planned or hoped. 
  
        I think this is important.  When I read this scripture sometimes I get a little uncomfortable.  It could be seen as a magical formula, a roadmap to get God to give you what you want.  “If you want your prayers answered just keep at it and God will give in.” Then, if you don’t get what you want it’s your fault for not being persistent.  Sometimes people do that with faith, they try to sell it as a formula for having all of your wishes granted, and they may even point to scriptures like this and say “see, you just keep asking and it will happen.”  I think that is overly simplistic and not at all a feeder of hope but rather of hopelessness. 
  
        Well-known author and researcher Brene Brown says “Men and women who self-report as hopeful put considerable value on persistence and hard work.  The new cultural belief that everything should be fun, fast, and easy is inconsistent with hopeful thinking.  It also sets us up for hopelessness.  When we experience something that is difficult and requires significant time and effort, we are quick to think, “This is supposed to be easy; it’s not worth the effort, or, this should be easier: it’s only hard and slow because I’m not good at it.  Hopeful self-talk sounds more like, this is tough, but I can do it.[1]” So, yes, this woman is a widow and she has been through some stuff.  She isn’t expecting quick and easy answers, she is prepared to persist.  This judge is tough, but she knows she can do it. Rather than a magical formula for easy faith, this is about hanging on to hope when faith isn’t so easy.

          After describing the widow and the judge, Jesus goes on to tell us about God.  God is long-suffering, tolerant, justice-favoring, merciful and listening.  God is with us in the frustration, the darkness, the unknown, the crying out in the night.  The judge who doesn’t have any regard for others is the contrast to God who cares.  This isn’t a magical wish-granting God but rather a persisting and eternal God who sticks with us, our God who does have regard for others and in fact loves us no matter our circumstance.

          In her book, Kate Bowler intimately shares her experience of being a seminary professor, lifelong Christian, mother of a toddler, wife and finding out she had stage 4 cancer throughout her body.  She says “At a time when I should have felt abandoned by God, I was not reduced to ashes.  I felt like I was floating, floating on the love and prayers of all those who hummed around me like worker bees … They came in like priests and mirrored back to me the face of Jesus.  When they sat beside me, my hand in their hands, my own suffering began to feel like it had revealed to me the suffering of others, a world of those who, like me, are stumbling in the debris of dreams they thought they were entitled to and plans they didn’t realize they had made.  That floating feeling stayed with me for months. . . I began to ask friends, theologians, historians, and pastors I knew, What am I going to do when it’s gone? … all said yes, it will go.  The feelings will go.  The sense of God’s presence will go … but they will leave an imprint.  I would somehow be marked by the presence of an unbidden God … I suppose I am like the man who wrote to me to say he had seen a friend [die] and felt the presence of God in the same long, dark night. Yes.  That is the God I believe in.”[2]

          This is the God we hear about today in the scriptures.  The God who in the darkest of times is with us.  The God of the widows, the God of those up against struggles, those who have been through pain, those without power, those who have seen some stuff.  Our persistent hope that plows through the frustrations comes from knowing who our God is- justice-favoring, merciful, long-suffering … persistent in loving us. 

          So we keep at it.  We try hope and fight for what we believe in.  We try hope and teach the next generation.  We try hope and pray through our darkest of nights.  We try hope and confront systems of oppression, injustices as big and as insurmountable as mountains.  We try hope and keep kneeling Sunday after Sunday with hearts open and gratitude on our lips.  We try hope and let others rest their weight on us when they feel defeated.  Not because we believe it will be easy or because we believe it’s a magical formula, but because we believe in a God who is long-suffering, merciful, justice-favoring and persistent in loving us. 

          At the end of this parable Jesus poses a question to the disciples which cuts through the pages, passes through the years and comes to us today “When the Son of man comes, will he find faith on earth?” …What do you think?  After the wars, the pain, the health complications, the broken relationships, the oppression, the frustrations, exhaustion, despair, peer pressure … will Jesus find faith on earth?”

          So … I guess I’ll keep trying to get people to do stuff.  I’ll keep trying to get the kids to be good humans, to help schools meet the needs of all children, to encourage sometimes reluctant teens to keep their hearts open, to get a skeptical world to give a church with ancient rituals and old hymns a fair shot and I’ll keep chipping away at the mountains before me with my tiny fork.  But not because I believe I can do any of this based on my own likability or persuasive skills, but because I believe in a God who persistently loves us.  So I’ll keep coming here and kneeling, persisting in prayer next to you, sustained by the body and blood of Christ.
          “Will Jesus find faith on earth?”  I hope so …


[1] “Learning to Hope” Behavioral Health Evolution 
[2] Bowler, Kate.  Everything Happens for a Reason: And Other Lies I’ve Loved.  Random House: 2018.  Pgs. 121-122

Wednesday, September 25, 2019

Saying the Wrong Thing



     I've recently made friends with a Rabbi. She is great and when we get together the conversation easily flows and I feel completely comfortable, but as I am talking I also am repeatedly aware of the many errors in my word choices. I say “church” when I mean “synagogue.” I say “pastor” when I mean to say “religious leader.” I say “Old Testament” when I mean to say “Hebrew Bible.” Sometimes I fumble a bit and make a face to say “oops” to which she responds with complete grace and understanding, but I still want to get it right. I want to create a space with my words of equality and mutual respect rather than expecting the other person to adjust and accommodate my assumptions and bias.

     I was thinking about this as I led women's book group this week. We are talking about race. And slowly but surely we are all sharing our hearts, confronting our biases and being challenged … but not without fear of saying the wrong thing. We are reading the book I'm Still Here by Austin Channing Brown. In one of the chapters we read this week Brown says “sadly, most white people are more worried about being called racist than about whether or not their actions are in fact racist or harmful.” I asked the group if they have found this to be true. One woman in the group shared a time when she was called out for something she said that offended someone and what that felt like. This woman is an incredibly thoughtful, intelligent and kind person and while this experience was difficult for her, she learned and grew from it.

     I hate that feeling … when you realize you said the wrong thing and hurt, offended or pushed someone away. I replay those conversations when my mind is trying to quiet down. It goes something like this: turn off lamp, head hits the pillow, deep exhale, eyes close and then a voice in my head says “remember that time seven years ago when you asked that woman if she was her sister's mother and she looked horrified and everyone around heard it?” cringe, toss and turn …

     Of course that isn't the only time I have said the wrong thing or pushed too far with personal questions. I hope that I have learned and grown from each experience. Part of me wants to retreat and lock my lips for good after those experiences, but that isn't my personality and it isn't a possibility in my line of work.

     Clergy have to use words. We have to put ourselves out there and get to know new people all the time, try to remember names, write newsletter articles, teach classes and of course preach sermons to a mostly captive audience. All this at a time when people love calling out others for saying the wrong thing. No one wants to be the next viral video of a jerk saying something stupid for all the trolls to rip to shreds. But we can't stop speaking. If we do, how do we learn and grow? How do we honestly confront our biases and ignorances? How do we make connections and work together to better one another?

     This morning I listened to The Moth while I worked out and heard this great story by Pádraig Ó'Tuama. He did this really brave thing and created a space where he could have conversations with people who were different from him. For two days he and other LGBTQ persons met with religious leaders who believe homosexuality is wrong. As one might imagine it was tense, tough and exhausting for all involved. Just before it ended a man who was not of the same mind as Padraig asked a simple question of the group, “How many times have I bruised you with my words?” When one participant said “I lost count the first night.” The man said “I have some work to do.” Padraig shared how hopeful and loving that moment was.

     We have work to do. But still we use words. We use them to learn, grow, connect and express ourselves. So on Tuesday mornings I get together with ten other women of all different ages and we try our best with our words to understand the words of another, to learn, grow, challenge and turn bruises into openings for love.