John 14:15-21
If you ever want to have an awkward and uncomfortable conversation
with someone, ask them if they go to church. Believe me, because I have that
awkward conversation with people quite often. Not just out of the blue, but as
a hospital chaplain, sometimes I am trying to discern where the patient finds
community, connection or support. Also, I always ask patients if they would
like prayer and in order to know how best to pray, it’s helpful to know if they
practice a particular faith. And so I have tried to word the question
differently, to make it as open and gentle as possible and to show that I have
no ulterior motive in asking. Because people usually think you are trying to
judge or convert them. They almost always
think there is something behind it. And so people often respond to that
question with defensiveness, guardedness, justifications, guilt or anger. And I
get it, people can be judgy or pushy, or even forceful or sneaky with attempts
to convince or convert. But it makes it hard when you just genuinely want to
know … without the judgement.
It’s like when you tell people you are a pastor or sing in
the church choir or volunteer at church. Often people will get awkward and
start explaining why they don’t go to church, or why they missed a few Sundays or
their intentions of someday going back. Sometimes they may apologize for swearing,
hide their beer or tell you why they don’t like church. I just listen, and try
my best to show that I am not actually someone looking to make them feel bad.
I hear a lot of people say things like “I don’t need to go
to church because I don’t need someone telling me how to talk to God, I can do
that without someone up there acting like they know better” or “those people go
to those churches and think they are so much better than everyone else, but
they all have their own problems” or “I went to a church and this person was
mean to me and hurt me and I never went back.” Or they list everything any
church has ever done wrong. And it’s true … churches are full of people and
people do things wrong. I have certainly encountered people in churches who
have done or said hurtful things, and even people who have done really awful
things. Just as I have encountered people like this outside of the church.
But when I think of church, I think of the church I grew up
in, where I learned to sing Bible songs and was welcomed by dedicated volunteer
Sunday School teachers and felt safe, felt loved. I think of times when my stomach
hurt with laughter while spending time with a youth group I was leading or all
the folks who could no longer attend church in person and welcomed me into
their homes as their pastor and told me their stories and sent me off full of
love, care and sometimes sweets. I think of watching children carefully bring
the light into the sanctuary as acolytes, I think of busy people coming
together on a weeknight to plan ways to reach out to the community, I think of
people praying for me and my loved ones, I think of seeing people feel safe
enough to let their tears out, I think of closing my eyes and feeling closer to
heaven as I am lifted by a choir of voices singing to God in unison. I think of
all those times of feeling touched, moved, connected … loved.
Feeling loved is an inspiring thing. In fact, it’s why we
as Christians do the things we do. So often people think that we church goers
are here every Sunday to earn points and feel holier than others, they feel
guilty because they think they haven’t done enough to please God, they feel a
distance between themselves and God because they think they haven’t earned God’s
good graces. But it’s actually the opposite. We don’t do things to earn God’s
love, God’s love is already there for us. God demonstrates this through Jesus
Christ, it’s there for free, for everyone, no points needed. We come together
in worship, we do acts of service, we care for one another as a response to
that love.
The passage from John that was read begins with this. Jesus
says, “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.” It’s about responding
from love, not earning love. And keeping the commandments of Jesus is an
opportunity to respond to the love of Christ. The commandments of Christ are an
invitation, to live out the love that we know and to make the Holy Spirit
known.
In this passage, Jesus is preparing the disciples for a
time when he will not be physically present in the way that he is now. He says that
God will give them an Advocate, some translations say Paraclete. This is the
Holy Spirit who will guide, help, strengthen and comfort them. But Jesus goes
on to say that the world does not see or know the Spirit, but that the Spirit
will abide with them.
So this is our call as Christians, to respond to the love
of Jesus Christ by showing love to others and in doing so, others will see the
Holy Spirit at work and come to know of this presence of comfort, strength and
help.
This means we do have an important role to play. As much as
I do think people can be unfair in how they prejudge church-goers or
Christians, the truth is, others are watching us, and we have a responsibility
to act as followers of Christ. We are called to make the presence of Christ known
here on earth. We are called to live out Jesus’s commandments to love others
and show others that they are not alone, the Holy Spirit is here. To let others
know that they are loved.
I have always been fascinated by Psychology, so much so
that my bachelor’s degree is in Psychology. I like finding what is underneath
people’s thoughts, behaviors and actions and I am so very curious about how
people think, react to and relate to others. But sometimes I need a break from
it. I will find myself watching video clips, reading articles and listening to podcasts
and learning so much about the ways in which people’s upbringings, traumatic
experiences or subconscious needs are guiding what they do. But then I see
love, just pure love and there really is no explanation for it. The kind of
love that has no benefit to the person giving it, the kind of love that doesn’t
make sense given all the heartbreak someone has been through- the kind of love
that reminds you that we are so much more than our psychological traumas,
animal instincts or reward driven behaviors.
Several
times I have sat with spouses as they lovingly and tenderly cared for their
spouse who was suffering due to some circumstance like a traumatic brain injury
or disease, and will never be able to reciprocate in the same way or live out
the plans they made when they got married, and still … the caregiving spouse
loves, they stroke their hair, they talk about the good memories, they offer
smiles, they make their spouse feel loved. It doesn’t make sense, it’s hard to
explain, it’s the love that Christ demonstrates for us, the kind of love that makes
the presence of the Holy Spirit known in the world.
I
also see this pure love when I visit new parents right after they have had a
baby. At that point most parents are pretty tired, shocked, overwhelmed,
worried or dazed, but not the grandparents. In a room where the baby is crying,
the new parents are sweating and stressing … off to the side I sometimes see
the beaming, happy grandparents. No stress, no worries about how to raise the perfect
child or which products are organic enough or how to properly install a car
seat, just joy, just peace, just love. It doesn’t make sense, it’s hard to
explain, it’s the love Christ demonstrates for us, God’s beloved children, the
kind of love that makes the presence of the Holy Spirit known in the world.
Today
is Mother’s Day. And I know that can bring a lot of emotions for people. Some
are missing their mothers today, some are missing their children today and some
have complicated relationships with their mothers. Human relationships don’t
always fit our expectations or always demonstrate that perfect love that we
long for. I know that I am not a perfect mother. I love my kids so much it
makes my heart burst, but I am a human, and I don’t do things perfectly. Since
they were born, I have prayed that somehow, even through all of my
imperfections and all of the pain of the world, my children will feel that
perfect, pure love that comes from Christ. The kind that doesn’t make sense,
the kind that can’t be explained, the kind of love that will make the presence
of the Holy Spirit known to them.
Sometimes,
in my work as a hospital chaplain, the hardest part can be leaving the room.
Because there are a lot of lonely people in the world and it feels sad to walk
out the door, move on with my life and know that people are alone and hurting. So
when I pray with patients, I always pray that they will feel the presence of
the Holy Spirit in and through and around them, that they will feel held in the
palm of God’s hand and know that they are not alone. Because of faith, I believe
that somehow, someway in a way that can’t be explained, they are not alone, the
Holy Spirit, the Advocate, the Paraclete that Jesus told us about, is there
with them.
In
May of the year 1373, Julian of Norwich experienced divine revelations from her
cell attached to a small church in the town of Norwich, England. She
immediately wrote these down and you can read them compiled in a book called “Showings.”
Some years ago I got to go and sit in that cell where she wrote these and
still, all these hundreds of years later, there is a palpable feeling of
holiness in that space, a feeling that the Holy Spirit has been and still is
there. These revelations she had are powerful and have captured the faith and
hearts of many who have read them. They are words pouring from a heart in the
depths of love. In chapter 59 she writes, “As truly as God is our Father, so
truly is God our Mother, and he revealed that in everything, and especially in
these sweet words where he says: I am he; that is to say: I am he, the power
and goodness of fatherhood; I am he, the wisdom and the lovingness of
motherhood; I am he, the light and the grace which is all blessed love; I am he,
the Trinity; I am he, the unity; I am he, the great supreme goodness of every
kind of thing; I am he who makes you to love; I am he who makes you to long; I
am he, the endless fulfilling of all true desires. For where the soul is
highest, noblest, most honourable, still it is lowest meekest and mildest.” You can hear the rapturous tone in her writing
as she writes of that love which is hard to explain, doesn’t make sense but
makes the presence of the Holy Spirit known.
Jesus
says “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.” Let us live as a people
who are loved, as a people who know we are loved – even if it doesn’t make
sense and is hard to explain - and in doing so we will make the presence of the
Holy Spirit known here on earth.
